Asking a Woman For Dating Advice

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I remember a time when I lived with a friend about 8 years ago who was particularly bad with women. He was extremely frustrated, hadn’t been laid in well over a year and dealt with ANY female attention he got in an extremely desperate and excitable way.

One day when he arrived home from work on a Friday he seemed happier than normal and was grinning from check to cheek. “It’s Friday night and I’ve got a good feeling about town tonight” he uttered, “why” I said in response. “Well I’ve been talking to all the older, more experienced girls in the office all week and they have written me a list of the ten most important things I need to do to attract a women. “Here we go” i thought…. “really” I said as my curiously piqued and i started to cringe. “May I take a look at the list?” “Sure.”

Even though it was a long time ago I can remember most what was on there. Ten or so points that the women in his office had told him to do in order to be attractive to the opposite sex. Even though at this point in time my game and red pill knowledge was in its infancy, I knew that taking advice about dating from a women is one of the worse things you can do. As we know women generally think and react emotionally where men tend to think and react more logically. This is why the idea of a logical list of points to follow appealed to my friend so much.

It went something like this:

  • Be yourself; if you’re shy it doesn’t matter, ‘the one’ will love you for who you are..
  • Always compliment a women and bringing a gift on the first date is often a great idea..
  • Always listen to her and try and help her solve her problems..
  • Never be rude or mean. Be polite and call her as much as possible..
  • Always offer to buy her a and her friends a drink at the bar/club..
  • Never interrupt her when she is speaking with her friends at a bar/club..


Even in my early gaming days I knew this list to be a disaster, and that any small chance of success my friend had would be achieved mainly by doing the exact opposite of this list. I of course tried to explain this to him; but I was immediately shot down-“this stuff is gold and what I’ve always thought and been told was right” he said.

We parted ways a few months later after about a year of sharing an apartment together, but in this time all he’d managed to do was get a terrible case of ‘oneitis’ for a very average brunette who kept him in her orbit of guys that she’d occasionally hang out with. After seeing him again recently he told me that he was engaged to a feminist lawyer type (after he described her to me) who he had met on a night out in the local town. I think this is one of the only women he had ever been with, and he was hanging on so tight to her it was scary.

I attempted to explain to him the value of travel, of meeting women in far off lands who are beautiful and feminine. Women who would make him think twice about what he could get and ultimately improve his life for the better. It amazes me how so many guys, especially amongst friends and peers back home in the UK who will settle for almost any girl that will have them. Of course a man makes his own way in the world and learns (well should) from his mistakes but it’s often disheartening to see good men settle for less, when there is so much more to be discovered out there.


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